2011 In Review: Mel's Worst Films

It's that time of year when we lay out the lists of Bests and Worsts. Here is a list of the films I watched, er, suffered through and consider the stinkers of this year. If you've seen them, my condolences, if not thank the Universe that others took that blow to the cranium for you.

Here they are in no particular order...

Red Riding Hood

Are you effing kidding me? This movie was so bad it would have made Ed Wood cry. We got medieval peasants with more hair product than Paul Mitchell booty-popping and gettin' their swerve on with a strangely anachronastic band. Mix in a lame CGI werewolf and the worst acting since Twilight the First and you have a stew of wretched garbage to be avoided at all costs.

Green Hornet

Are we in 2011 or 1911? This was a disgusting racist, misogynistic piece of crap that Seth Rogan should be drawn and quartered for. Jay Chou's Kato is still a house boy and Cameron Diaz' Lenore Case is a secretary straight out of Mad Men. As if that weren't awful enough, there were the giant plot holes, bad dialogue and set design that was caught somewhere between 1960's chic and Disney decadence.

Captain America

I got lambasted for this because oh I didn't understand Cap and the world he came from and blah, blah, blah. I don't care. From acting to dialogue to horrific CGI and plot, this movie was so bad I couldn't even muster a laugh. I was appalled that I had paid for this. And that damned theater would not give me my money back, either. Cheap bastards! I really should sue Marvel for pain and suffering.

Country Strong

Though officially released on Dec 26 2010, I'm counting this one cuz I saw it in January. Nicholas Sparks goes country. The cliches in this one could constitute a drinking game that would have everyone reeling pickled about twenty minutes in. Bad music, bad acting, big hair and enough crying to drown Noah and his ark.

Something Borrowed

Pay attention now, you see the way to get the man you want is to steal him away from his fiancee who happens to be your best friend. But it's all okay cuz you're a good girl and she's really a heinous, spoiled bitch. Whatever. The plot aside, the acting was just dismal as was the trite dialogue. I love Ginnifer Goodwin and Kate Hudson so I though this would be cute, but it was really just bad.

Footloose Redux

Seriously? Who the hell was the genius behind this piece of shit? Everything was the same from Kevin Bacon's original 1984 version, except that the acting and the dancing got worse and wow, John Lithgow's minister became Dennis Quaid's sheriff.














Well, there you go, my worst films that I paid to see this year. Agree, violently disagree? Talk to me. What are your worst?